Muggleborn Headcanons
by A Bean
Summary: Basically what it says on the tin :) Text-posts from Tumblr written into story format. I hope you like it! Drabbles and no pairings, usually, unless the text-post calls for it.
1. Chapter 1

**DISCLAIMER: I OWN NO HARRY POTTER OR ANY TEXT-POSTS INVOLVED IN THE MAKING OF THIS STORY.**

 **Text-post Base: "You got mud on your face, you big disgrace…"**

Allie headed to the Slytherin common rooms after Potions. Unbeknownst to her, Professor Snape was following her because he needed to talk to a student.

They passed the entrance to the Great Hall, where many students were going back to their common rooms. A pure-blood Slytherin- the same student Snape needed to talk to- got in line behind Allie. He pushed her over into the student in front of her, spilling the books and papaers she had in her bag. Snape made to intervene, but it looked like she had it under control. He waited and watched.

"Watch where you're going, _mudblood_ ," he heard the boy say. Allie got up. "What did you call me?"

"A mudblood. Someone who isn't worthy of magical blood because they were raised by Muggles. Too bad you're the only one in Slytherin," he jeered. A few Slytherin kids looked like they wanted to murder him, but refrained themselves.

Allie looked hurt for a moment, but a malicious grin crossed her face. Before either Snape or the pure-blood could respond, she licked her hand and put it on the pure-blood's face.

And Snape heard:

"You got mud on your face, you big disgrace, somebody better put you back in your place."

She repeated the line again, and this time from Gryffindor, Ravenclaw, and Hufflepuff, kids started going _stomp, stomp, clap! Stomp stomp clap!_ in a circle, gradually pressing in on the pure-blood. He looked panicky.

"Is this a muggle-born ritual? I'm gonna die! Help!" and he pushed past everyone in the circle, leaving his bag. The four Houses looked very accomplished of themselves. As quickly as it had come, the crowd dispersed.

Snape secretly awarded 50 points to Slytherin for that amazing performance.


	2. Chapter 2

**A/N: I'm tired of writing disclaimers so this is the last one. I don't own Harry Potter or any of the text-posts used in this story. Just borrowing, thanks.**

 **Anyway, I need to decide a time for when to update. I swear to the Prydonian Oaths of Gallifrey that I will do my best to update whenever you collectively decide.**

 **Text-Post Base: Hufflepuff to Slytherin: Snickers**

Coming to a stop just outside the Great Hall with his inter-House friends, Sophie was confronted by a pure-blood Slytherin. One who greatly liked to tease her.

"Why haven't you got dirt on your face, mudblood? " he asked. "Tried to wash it all away, huh? Well, I can still see through your mask. Your mud mask. What's it like, stealing a wand from other _pure-blood_ wizards? Sure hope you don't get caught- oh wait, yes, I do!"

His banter continued on for a few more minutes, while Sophie stood there, saying nothing. Eventually he stopped, but she wasn't sure if it was because he ran out of things to say or he was confused as to why she wasn't responding.

She dug in her ag for a minute, trying to find it… oh, yes, there it was. She handed it to the Slytherin.

"What's this?"

"A Snickers, bro. You're mad when you're hungry," she replied, and all the students near her just _lost it._

The Slytherin wasn't able to escape from this for the next few weeks.


	3. Chapter 3

**DISCLAIMER: I OWN NO CHARACTER OF HARRY POTTER AND OWN NO TEXT-POSTS THIS STORY IS BASED OFF OF.**

 **Text-Post Base: Slytherin Muggle-Borns Buying Pens (those fuckers exist and you know it)**

"Hey," Hector said to his friend Ash while they were shopping in Diagon Alley, "Why don't we use pens instead of quills? It would make life so much easier!"

"You think they'd let them in?" Ash asked.

"Yeah, if we put packages of them in our trunks. It's not like they search them, or anything."

"…Alright, Hector, but if we get caught it's your fault."

Hector waved it off. "Come on, let's go buy some."

When Hector and Ash arrived at Hogwarts for their second year, they had successfully smuggled in pens. During Hector's first class, Defense against the Dark Arts, he pulled out a pen to start taking notes. He clicked it several times in thought throughout the class. The teacher looked up. "What is that clicking noise?"

Hector ceased immediately. After a while, a pure-blood Hufflepuff asked him what he was writing with.

"It's a pen," he said. "Haven't you heard of one?"

The Hufflepuff shook his head.

"Well, you don't have to dip it in ink every time you want to write something," Hector explained.

"Wow!" the Hufflepuff exclaimed. "Can I try?"

"Sure." Hector gave him his pen. "Keep it. I've got more."

Pretty soon, word got around the students of Hogwarts, and they all came to Hector and Ash for a pen. They started selling them to buyers for 10 Sickles apiece.

"We're gonna be rich," Hector said to Ash one day.


	4. Chapter 4

**DISCLAIMER: I OWN NO CHARACTER OF HARRY POTTER OR ANY OF THE TEXT-POSTS USED TO CREATE THIS STORY**

 **Text-Post Base: Quidditch Match with Gryffindor and Slytherin**

It had been a fairly normal start to the match, Professor McGonagall thought to herself. Let's hope it stays that way.

A few more minutes of peace, until Slytherin made a particularly gruesome foul against Gryffindor. She had just told off Lee Jordan for making ruse remarks when-

"We will, we will rock you! We will, we will rock you!"

It was small at first, she supposed it was only a few Gryffindors being silly.

But then it got louder, directed only at the Slytherin spectators.

" _WE WILL, WE WILL ROCK YOU! WE WILL, WE WILL ROCK YOU!"_ This was followed by a _stomp, stomp, clap!_ Each time the line was repeated. Soon, the Hufflepuff and Ravenclaw spectators were in on it, too.

She looked to the Slytherin side of the field. A few seemed to be plotting. They turned to all the other Slytherins and directed them with something. Then all of them turned to Gryffindor.

" _WHO LET THE DOGS OUT?!"_ was sung, more bellowed than anything, followed by the sound of barking dogs. Gryffindor was temporarily stunned by this, but they kept going until the match had basically paused to watch the chaos going on in the stands. It got louder and louder, shifting between "Who let the dogs out" and "We will rock you".

She didn't even try to stop it.


	5. Chapter 5

**YAYY I'VE BEEN REALLY GOOD AT WRITING THESE BUT POSSIBLY NOT UPDATING**

 **I DON'T KNOW YET**

 **See, time-travel is** _ **very**_ **difficult to keep in order, I don't know quite where this story's at… chapter four, I think?**

 **ANYWAY**

 **NEXT CHAPTER!**

 **Text-Post Base: Transfiguring Pumpkins into Carriages and what the spell is for it**

"Professor McGonagall," a first-year Gryffindor piped up. "I had a question on transfiguration."

Alyssa and her friends did have lots of questions when McGonagall had seen them. But she prepared herself to listen.

"Is it possible to turn pumpkins into carriages?"

There were many giggles following this as well as confused looks from other students.

McGonagall was slightly taken aback by this actually on-topic question, but answered.

"Yes, I suppose it is. Why do you ask?"

"…No reason, Professor." The class worked on.

A few minutes later, another student- Peter, she noted- raised his hand.

"Yes?"

"What's the spell for it?"

"The spell for what, Mr. Davison?"

"The spell for turning pumpkins into carriages," he giggled.

"Well, I'm afraid I can't tell you that, Mr. Davison, otherwise you could perform that spell."

"Oh. Alright then, Professor. I just wanted to, uh, refresh my memory. I forgot what it was."

"Do you mean to say you already know the spell?" McGonagall asked, astonished.

"Yes, Professor."

"Then do tell me, Mr. Davison, what is it?"

There were many more laughs from this, all trying to be stifled behind a hand. Peter himself laughed, before someone behind him slapped him on the back. Finally he said it, the students waiting and watching with more attention than she had ever gotten alone.

"Bippity-boppity-boo," Peter finally managed to choke out behind his laughter.

At this point, the entire class completely fell apart with laughter. About half the class was out of their seats with laughter, while the rest, including McGonagall, looked on with confused expressions.

Professor McGonagall had to decide when to retire.


	6. Chapter 6

**HELLO AGAIN MY LOVLIES! (SINGULAR?)**

 **DID YOU LIKE THE LAST ONE? I HOPE YOU DID. I DON'T EVEN KNOW WHAT THE LAST ONE WAS. TIME IS REALLY CONFUSING. (HAVEN'T I SAID THAT ALREADY?) ARRGGGHH STOP TALKING**

 **OKAY. ON WITH THE STORY. CHAPTER SEVEN?**

 **Text-Post Base: AYYYY MACERANA**

The last time the Yule Ball had been held, it was rumored that Harry Potter himself had been the only student ever to be picked for a _fourth_ contestant. A fourth one! How about that! Headmistress McGonagall had been asked if it was true, and she said it was, but 'don't go trying it yourself.'

So, obviously, everyone did. But there were only 3 contestants, as always. The one from Hogwarts was a sixth-year Ravenclaw named Kistane Shafecane. Everybody always called her Kris, even though there was no 'r' in her name.

It was fabulous that she was muggle-born and people knew it.

 _Sort of flashback that's really important (not really but it's funny) for the story_

"And now, ladies and gentlemen, it is time to pick the contestants for the Tri-Wizard Tournament!" Headmistress McGonagall announced. Everyone was excited.

A paper flew out of the red fire. McGonagall caught it and read the paper:

"And our Durmstang competitor is…"

The whole school held their breath, waiting for an answer.

"Poniac Almedia!" Several people cheered at his name, and he proudly strutted up to shake the Headmistress' hand.

"Our Beauxbatons competitor is…"

Everyone looked at who they thought would be the competitor.

"Gabrielle DeLacoure!"

There were many more cheers than there had been for Pontiac; Gabrielle's sister, Fleur DeLacoure, had been in the competition herself. Gabrielle shook McGonagall's hand and left to join Pontiac.

"And, last but not least, our Hogwarts competitor is Kistane Shafecane!"

There was an uproar in the Great Hall. Apparently Kistane was a popular girl.

She went up to shake McGonagall's hand. But before she left the room, she held up 3 fingers and whistled a rueful tone McGonagall had never heard of before. Excluding two or three people that were in the Great Hall, everyone did it back. They raised their hands and whistled back. And then Kistane left, like nothing unusual had happened.

 _End Hunger Games-like flashback that really has nothing to do with the story but oh well_

Now, people were at the Yule Ball, something everybody had been waiting for since the beginning of the tournament. Kistane had chosen a guy named Beltone from Durmstrang. Poniac had chosen a girl named Rose, who attended Beauxbatons. And Gabrielle _wanted_ to take Kistane, because she was really hot and Kistane was all for it, but she settled for a Hogwarts Ravenclaw girl called Nyssa Traken who was best friends with Gryffindor Peter Davison who's brother was friends with Ron Weasley who was Bill Weasley's brother who was Gabrielle's sister's husband. So in a way, they were related.

Anyway, enough with family history. Onto the fun part.

Some Muggle-born students (including Kistane, obviously) decided that Muggle music was needed at the Yule Ball. Unfortunately, the Weird Sisters were unable to perform because of their tour across Britain. So that meant Professor Flitwick had to enchant instruments to play the music.

Of course, this was great news for the small group of perfect students in Charms.

They offered to help Professor Flitwick enchant them, because there was a special list the instruments had to follow.

So they added a few Muggle music songs that they thought everyone would enjoy. Professor Flitwick never knew.

After the first few sings everyone had danced to, there was an unfamiliar tune playing- at least it would've been if all the muggle-borns hadn't immediately recognized it.

Someone screamed "HOLY SHIT" and a mass movement of _people_ moved to the center of the dance floor and did a completely choreographed dance as if they knew it by heart.

 _Dale a tu cuerpo alegría Macarena_

 _Que tu cuerpo es pa' darle alegría y Cosa Buena_

 _Dale a tu cuerpo alegría Macarena_

 _ **AYYYYYYYYY MACARENA**_

At this _**AYYYY MACARENA**_ lots of people shouted it and continued singing and dancing.

 _Dale a tu cuerpo alegría Macarena_

 _Que tu cuerpo es pa' darle alegría y Cosa Buena_

 _Dale a tu cuerpo alegría Macarena_

 _ **AYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY MACARENA**_

At this point, many people began to wonder what the hell was going on. Some had even tried to join in to the dance, while others were looking at their friends and going _do you know this song?_

 _Macarena tiene un novio que se llama_

 _Que se llama de apellido vitorino_

 _Y en la jura de bandera del muchacho_

 _Se la via con dos amigos_

 _Ay!_

Many people had given up at this point. They didn't try to understand this dance or try to stop the ones doing it. The new people who had joined in had gotten the hang of the dance (although there were a few still trying in the back, stepping on their friends occasionally) and were enjoying themselves.

 _Macarena tiene un novio que se llama_

 _Que se llama de apellido vitorino_

 _Y en la jura de bandera del muchacho_

 _Se la via con dos amigos_

 _Ay!_

 _Dale a tu cuerpo alegría Macarena_

 _Que tu cuerpo es pa' darle alegría y Cosa Buena_

 _Dale a tu cuerpo alegría Macarena_

 _ **AYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY MACARENA**_

 _Dale a tu cuerpo alegría Macarena_

 _Que tu cuerpo es pa' darle alegría y Cosa Buena_

 _Dale a tu cuerpo alegría Macarena_

 _ **AYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY MACARENA**_

 _Macarena, Macarena, Macarena_

 _Que le Gustan los veranos de Marbella_

 _Macarena, Macarena, Macarena_

 _Que le Gusta la movida guerrilla_

 _Ay!_

 _Dale a tu cuerpo alegría Macarena_

 _Que tu cuerpo es pa' darle alegría y Cosa Buena_

 _Dale a tu cuerpo alegría Macarena_

 _ **AYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY MACARENA**_

 _Dale a tu cuerpo alegría Macarena_

 _Que tu cuerpo es pa' darle alegría y Cosa Buena_

 _Dale a tu cuerpo alegría Macarena_

 _ **AYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY MACARENA**_

 _Ay!_

 _Macarena suena con el corte ingles_

 _Y se compra los modelos mas modernos_

 _Le gustaría viviere en "nueva york"_

 _Y ligar un novio nuevo_

 _Macarena suena con el corte ingles_

 _Y se compra los modelos mas modernos_

 _Le gustaría viviere en "nueva york"_

 _Y ligur novio nuevo_

 _Ay!_

 _Dale a tu cuerpo alegría Macarena_

 _Que tu cuerpo es pa' darle alegría y Cosa Buena_

 _Dale a tu cuerpo alegría Macarena_

 _ **AYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY MACARENA**_

 _Ay!_

 _Macarena tiene un novio que se llama_

 _Que se llama de apellido vitorino_

 _Y en la jura de bandera del muchacho_

 _Se la via con dos amigos_

 _Ay!_

 _Macarena tiene un novio que se llama_

 _Que se llama de apellido vitorino_

 _Y en la jura de bandera del muchacho_

 _Se la via con dos amigos_

 _Ay!_

 _Dale a tu cuerpo alegría Macarena_

 _Que tu cuerpo es pa' darle alegría y Cosa Buena_

 _Dale a tu cuerpo alegría Macarena_

 _ **AYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY MACARENA**_

 _Ay!_

There was a short pause after this, but the song continued:

 _Dale a tu cuerpo alegría Macarena_

 _Que tu cuerpo es pa' darle alegría y Cosa Buena_

 _Dale a tu cuerpo alegría Macarena_

 _ **AYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY MACARENA**_

 _Ay!_

 _Dale a tu cuerpo alegría Macarena_

 _Que tu cuerpo es pa' darle alegría y Cosa Buena_

 _Dale a tu cuerpo alegría Macarena_

 _ **AYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY MACARENA**_

 _Ay!_

 _Dale a tu cuerpo alegría Macarena_

 _Que tu cuerpo es pa' darle alegría y Cosa Buena_

 _Dale a tu cuerpo alegría Macarena_

 _ **AYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY MACARENA**_

 _Ay!_

 _Dale a tu cuerpo alegría Macarena_

 _Que tu cuerpo es pa' darle alegría y Cosa Buena_

 _Dale a tu cuerpo alegría Macarena_

 _ **AYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY MACARENA**_

 _Ay!_

And with that, w\the song ended, and the regular music came back on. People were asking what happened, but all the dancers would say was " **AYYYYYYYYY MACARENA"** so they never really got answers. But nobody really minded.

 **A/N: JUST SO YOU KNOW, I SPENT ALL OF AN EARTH NIGHT CYCLE RESEARCHING THE LYRICS FOR THIS. I HOPE YOU'RE ALL HAPPY WITH IT.**


	7. Chapter 7

_**VOLDEMORT**_

 **ANYWAY, HELLO MY FOLLOWERS! (IF I HAVE ANY) WHAT CHAPTER IS THIS? SEVEN? MAYBE I SHOULD STAY IN ONE PLACE FOR A LITTLE BIT… THE FUTURE GETS VERY CONFUSING. WHILE I RECOMMEND TIME-TRAVEL, MAKE SURE YOU ALWAYS GO BACK TO WHERE YOU STARTED, BECAUSE THEN IT JUST GETS CONFUSING.**

 **DID YOU KNOW, A FRIEND OF MINE ACCIDENTALLY INVENTED THE HOVERBOARD IN THE 70** **TH** **CENTURY! HA!**

 **OH, YOU'RE NOT SUPPOSED TO KNOW THAT. FORGET THAT. UN-READ THAT.**

 **THIS IS DEFINITELY MY LONGEST ONE SO READ AND REVIEW! I LOVE THOSE REVIEWS.**

 **Text-Post Base: Senior Ditch Day**

"You know, back in my day, we used to ditch class. Just once or twice a year, really. The entire class would go and celebrate a day off from school, and so all the teachers wouldn't know. Have you ever done that?"

These were the words Michael Crane's father had said to him the day before September 1st. It sounded like a good idea. He brought it up with his friends in the compartment they were sitting in. They all thought it sounded like a great idea. Jay volunteered to go tell the rest of the Slytherins, Dani the rest of the Hufflepuffs, Ace the rest of the Ravenclaws, and Michael himself told the Gryffindors. They were all a part of these houses, anyway. Inter-House relationships were encouraged by teachers, anyway.

Michael went up the corridors, searching for Gryffindor students. He came into a compartment full of Slytherins- that wasn't fun.

Finally he found a Gryffindor with her Hufflepuff friend.

"Hey, Alyssa," Michael said. "Listen…"

He launched into Senior Ditch Day.

"Of course, we'd have to plan on where we're going and when," he added to the end, "But that can all be worked out if Prefects and popular people from each house discuss it in the Room of Requirement. You're a Prefect, you could go."

She agreed to this idea.

Eventually, when everybody got to the Great Hall in Hogwarts, there were many more whispers flying around than usual. Headmistress McGonagall decided that students were just happy to see each other again after summer break. What could they be planning, anyway?

During the Great Feast, Headmistress McGonagall was _shocked_ to see two sixth-year Gryffindors- _Gryffindors, of all Houses!_ \- go over and actually sit at the Slytherin table. And what was even weirder was that they all got along! It was practically unheard of!

Over the next few days, teachers constantly saw Ravenclaws sitting with Gryffindors, Hufflepuffs with Slytherins, and Gryffindors with Hufflepuffs! It was all very confusing. Why weren't the Slytherins banishing others from the table? How come Hufflepuffs were getting braver? **(Uh, no offense to anyone in Hufflepuff House, by the way.)** Ravenclaws were getting trickier and Gryffindors getting smarter.

They decided to put a stop to it.

At the next Feast, Headmistress McGonagall made the announcement that

"While inter-House relationships are encouraged, I shall have to ask you to sit at your own House Tables while at Feasts. Thank you."

Following this came many whispers, and McGonagall heard "Oh no! Do you think they know?" from a student that had practically shouted it out. The entire Great Hall then proceeded to _shhhh!_ that person all at once.

The teachers thought this very strange.

After making the rule that people had to sit at their own House tables, there were faces in each house that professors didn't know were in their house. But they went along with it, because they couldn't trade robes.

Granted, but they _could_ cast a spell that made their robes different colors.

The teachers, obviously, didn't know about this spell.

Michael and his friends had spread senior ditch day throughout the whole school, so now every student had heard of it. Every time they were asked about what they were whispering about, or "Where are you going to go when, Mr. Harper?" was very easily paid for by an excuse, such as, "Well, we're planning on going somewhere special for the next Hogsmeade trip, Professor," and "Oh, we're just talking about the lesson, Professor".

The teachers knew nothing, and at the next meeting of plans in the room of requirement Michael congratulated everyone on how good they were keeping this secret. At that very meeting, though, a first-year Ravenclaw piped up and told them of a place their family used to go to every year for summer vacation, and they owned it so nobody would be there. She brought a picture. It had a lake and everything. It was big enough for everyone to go for a day. Hufflepuffs decided to bring food because the Ravenclaw said there wouldn't be any, so that was taken care of. Somebody whipped out their phone and checked the weather forecast for the next two weeks and said that any day they could go was fine. It was decided for the day of 9 March. It would be a school day, to their satisfaction, and no rain or any weather other than sun would disturb them. Kids were asked to get owls from their parents containing swimsuits and other beach items they might have, and, let's just say, there were more owls than the post office in Hogsmeade had.

A Prefect wrote it all down on a large piece of parchment the Room had given him.

1: Hufflepuffs, bring food and drink.

2: Gryffindors, bring music. Muggle and Magical, please.

3: Slytherins, collect beach items and bring them along- swimsuits not included.

4: Ravenclaws, please bring beach-chairs and goggles.

5: Each person is responsible for their own belongings. Please remember towels and school robes.

6:All sixth and seventh-years who know how to Apparate will do so with first and second-years.

7: Third, fourth, and fifth-years will take their brooms. Two people to a broom, please. If needed, take the school brooms.

8: The teachers _MUST NOT_ know what we are planning. Keep them in the dark.

9: All Houses are responsible for their own Years. We have to make sure _every_ common room is deserted, no teachers must be able to find us. No student, however annoying, is to be left behind if we want to pull this off.

10: Ravenclaw Prefects are in charge of keeping track of time. We don't want to be late for dinner.

They were doing it; they were _really_ doing it! Everybody was so excited. Teachers were worried, what was going on? They were unable to find out.

Finally, on the day before they were deemed to go, everybody ate dinner and made sure everything was perfect for the next day.

When each House was fully awake, they all had a meeting in their Common Rooms.

Gryffindor's went spectacularly.

Prefect Annabeth Jackson held their powwow.

"Alright, everybody got their swimsuits on underneath? Good. Make sure, when you come back after breakfast, everything you need is in your bag. We won't be coming back until dinner. The most important thing is to not let the Professors know about this. Don't say one word at breakfast. At all. Everybody act mad at each other so it won't give way. Got that? Good. Let's get down to business.* No, don't sing it- sing it in the great hall."

When the Gryffindors got to the Great Hall, it was eerily quiet. All the other Houses had decided to not say a word either, in case of letting it slip.

At exactly 7: 36 Headmistress McGonagall knew there was something wrong. Every table was quiet. Not a Slytherin talking to each other. Not a Ravenclaw talking about the homework and how easy it was. In fact, when she took a better look, every student was glaring at the other.

She stood up.

"Good morning, students," she said.

Stony silence.

"I _said,_ good morning, students." She sound quite like Delores Umbridge when she said that.

"Good morning, Headmistress," they said in one big voice. But then that was it. Nothing else.

"Why are you all so quite today?"

All she got were glares at students and at her for asking this.

Suddenly, at the back of the Ravenclaw table the was a small shuffle, so small that nobody noticed. Well, it _looked_ like nobody noticed, but really, the Houses were sending and undetectable signal to each other: Three more minutes and it was time to go.

Headmistress McGonagall gave them all a queer look, but sat down to eat anyway, deciding not to disturb the silence.

Exactly three minutes after she sat, all the Houses, as one, got up and left the Great Hall.

The teachers all watched them go.

"…Well,that was strange."

Back in Slytherin Common Room, the seventh-years had paired up with one first-year and the sixth-years had all taken a second-year. **(Okay I'm going to interrupt here: I know you can't apparate directly in or out of Hogwarts but headcanon that McGonagall took that down after Dumbledore died)** They'd made copies of the picture the little Ravenclaw had brought, so they all thought of that and apparated. The third, fourth, and fifth-years had all gathered the leftover first and second-years and sneaked to the Entrance Hall and flew off. (The teachers were still eating.) Those who had phones used Google Maps to get there and the rest followed.

Pretty soon (or to be exact, 17 minutes after they had left breakfast), the whole school was deserted except for the teachers. The teachers, in turn, went to their classrooms to prepare for the day- but the students didn't come. They waited and waited- but no students. Nothing and no-one. So they all went to Headmistress McGonagall, who lead the Heads-of-Houses to search the Houses and the rest of the teachers search the rest of the school.

Professor Flitwick came to the Ravenclaw Tower. He knocked the knocker.

"Feed me and I will live, give me a drink and I will die. What am I?"

"Uh.. Uh…" Professor Flitwick thought a moment.

"Fire! Fire. You are fire."

"Correct," the knocker said, and it swung open to admit him.

He raced up the stairs to the boys' dormitory. There was no-one there, even under the beds. He cast the "Point Me" spell to any magical being in the room, and it spun only towards himself. He went to the girls' dormitories- or at east tried to, as he wasn't a girl. "Let me up, I'm a _teacher,_ for Merlin's sake!" So they let him in. It was deserted. Nobody was in here except himself. He went back to the common room and was about to leave when he saw a note taped to the back of the door. It read:

 _Dear Teachers:_

 _This is the whole of Ravenclaw House, if you didn't know. We've taken a day off. All of us. There's no-one here in the castle except the teachers and ghosts. Now, yes, this may set you in a panic, but don't worry as we have been planning this out all year. We're at a beach- you don't know which one, so don't try to find us. We'll be back for dinner._

 _Sincerely,_

 _Ravenclaw_

He went to the other teachers with his note, and, to his surprise, Slytherin, Gryffindor, and Hufflepuff had left one, too. The other teachers reported not seeing anyone else in the castle.

So they resigned their search and prepared their lessons for when the students came back.

Alyssa was having a _great_ time at the beach. She wondered why they hadn't thought of Senior Ditch Day earlier. As she swam in the big, crystal clear lake, she wondered if pure-bloods were wrong about Muggles, with their especially amazing invention called 'goggles' that let you see underwater. Combined with the Bubble-Head Charm, you could swim for hours without going up for air. So this is exactly what she did with Sophie.

Hector and Ash were busy slashing water on each other in the lake, and Hector got a brilliant idea to dunk him. So while he was rubbing his eyes after a particularly large splash, Hector took Ash by surprise and shoved his head under the water.

Ash came up. "Hey!" he spluttered. "What's up with-" he was interrupted by two particularly big-boned Slytherins cannonballing into the water. He and Hector both got soaked. As for the rest of the Slytherins, most were either wading in the hallow parts or sunbathing. Not many of them had gotten in the water. The Ravenclaws were having a good time with the music- they were having a dance party inside the little shack. The Hufflepuffs were taking turns swimming and handing out snacks and drinks, while mostly Gryffindors were in the water. Some people from different Houses had decided to get together and play volleyball, teaching the pure-bloods how to play when they came over. Others still who were not sunbathing or swimming or snacking or partying were building sandcastles on the beach where all the sand molds were. It was an almost exact replica of Hogwarts, except smaller. Everyone was having a good time.

When they decided to break for lunch, everyone forgot about their House rivalries and sat amongst one another. Hot dogs and hamburgers were magically cooked by those who liked cooking; Ravenclaws still held the music and the rest managed to eat lunch through all the talking they were doing of sharing their experiences.

Finally, when it was time to go back to Hogwarts, the Ravenclaws announced that they'd be late for dinner if they didn't pack up. Grudgingly, everyone changed into appropriate casual attire and set off for Hogwarts.

The teachers were worried even more now. It was almost dinner time; where were the students?

Gradually everyone managed to get back to their own common rooms without being detected. They all sneaked downstairs very, very, _very_ quietly and sat themselves at their tales, but ended up sitting with their new other-House friends they'd made that day, regardless of what McGonagall had said earlier. They sat waiting until the food appeared, evene then they didn't eat until the teachers came in to find four House tables filled with lots of different people from each House.

Damn. How did they get in here so quietly? As soon as the teachers stepped foot in the Great Hall, everything stopped. The chattering, the clanking of silverware.

The teachers all stared for a moment, then McGonagall said, really quite politely,

"Well?'

The students stared at one another.

"How was it?"


	8. Chapter 8

**OKAY SO I THINK I'M CAUGHT UP ON THIS STORY NOW. EVERY POINT IN TIME I LAND IN THIS STORY IT'S ALWAYS VERY CONFUSING SO WE ARE ON CHAPTER 8. I'M RIGHT.**

 **NO, I'M RIGHT.**

 **OKAY, ON WITH THE STORY!**

 **Text-Post Base: Getting Rickrolled in the Great hall**

Jamie should've _known_ something was up when he got up in the morning. A really annoying commercial tune was stuck in his head, and it wouldn't go away. He got dressed and went downstairs to breakfast.

He was enjoying his blueberry pancakes when a sudden flapping of wings told him that the mail was here. He didn't bother looking up; he never got mail.

But he _did_ look up when a large, nails-on-a-chalkboard inhuman _**SCREECH!**_ came from above.

That was his owl.

His owl was carrying a rather large red, angry looking envelope. The owl dropped it in front of him and he sat there for a moment, wondering if it would be worse if he left it closed.

The entire Great Hall had fallen silent at the sight of Jamie's Howler. Even the Professors were watching eagerly, although they tried to hide it.

"Don't ignore it," a seventh-year said. "It's worse if you do."

Jamie cautiously opened it. He expected to get a bashing at least, but this Howler was completely different.

" _WE'RE NO STRANGERS TO LOVE…."_

" _YOU KNOW THE RULES AND SO DO I"_

" _A FULL COMMITMENT'S WHAT I'M THINKING OF"_

" _YOU WOULDN'T GET THIS FROM ANY OTHER GUY"_

" _IIIIII JUST WANNA TELL YOU"_

" _HOW I'M FEELIN'"_

" _GOTTA MAKE YOU UNDERSTAND"_

The half of the Hall that was not laughing so hard they couldn't breathe was looking around confusedly.

" _NEVER GONNA GIVE YOU UP! NEVER GONNA LET YOU DOWN!"_

" _NEVER GONNA RUN AROUND AND DESERT YOU!"_

" _NEVER GONNA MAKE YOU CRY! NEVER GONNA SAY GOODBYE! NEVER GONNA TELL A LIE AND HURT YOU!"_

By now, people were dancing to it and laughing at the song. One brave, brave Gryffindor guy grabbed the Howler from Jamie and sang with it.

He threw it up onto the Professors' Head Table.

And sang along with it.

To Professor Snape.

Of course, this made the entire Hall scream with mirth at this.

Professor Snape was obviously none too happy, but accepted it with stride.

After all, what fun could hurt him every once in a while?


	9. Chapter 9

**HEY, GUYS, SORRY FOR THE LATER THAN USUAL UPDATE TODAY BUT I THOUGHT I'D WRITTEN A NINTH CHAPTER AND I ACTUALLY HADN'T SO I'M SORRY ABOUT THAT. PLEASE, I'M ASKING YOU TO REQUEST FOR HEADCANONS BECAUSE I'VE DONE ALL THE GOOD ONES SO PLEASE, PLEASE ASK FOR CERTAIN ONES.**

 **Text-Post Base: O.W.L.s are coming up, take some Smarties!**

 ***I don't own the Smarties company either just sayin**

Hogsmeade's very own Honeydukes had started a small branch of selling Muggle candies, and, lots of people were happy about that.

Danielle and her friend Susan were noticing that people didn't know that Smarties didn't make them smarter. Nobody except Muggle-Borns knew.

So, of course, they exploited this to the pure and half-bloods.

They put up posters that said:

 _ **Nervous about upcoming N.E.W.T.s and O.W.L.s?**_

 _ **Take some Smarties! They're guaranteed to make you smarter, and enhance your smarts! Contact Danielle Brown and Susan Rodriguez for some! 5 Sickles for 5 Smarties! They won't be here long, so hurry and get them!**_

Of course, they magically enchanted it so teachers only saw a blank paper.

Later that year, after the tests, Dani and Susan had collected 30 galleons from Smarties that didn't even make you smart. They passed the idea on to the sixth-year muggle-borns, and it then became a secret tradition for all seventh-year Muggle-borns.

It was fabulous.


	10. Chapter 10

**HELLO AGAIN! I'M REALLY REALLY REALLY REALLY REALLY REALLY REALLY REALLY SORRY FOR THE LATE UPDATE AND NO NEWS OF IT. I HAVE NO EXCUSE, SO DO WITH ME WHAT YOU WILL.**

 _ **PLEASE READ!**_

 **I WILL UPDATE EVERY SATURDAY OR SUNDAY WHICHEVER IS BETTER FOR ME.**

 **REQUEST HEADCANONS! I'M RUNNING OUT OF IDEAS! PLEASE!**

 **REVIEW! IT MAKES MY DAY.**

 **TELL ME WHAT TELEVISION SHOWS YOU WATCH, SO I CAN TRY TO IMPLANT THEM IN THE STORY!**

 **READ ON!**

"Would you hurry _up_? We'll be late for Transfiguration and Dumbledore's subbing today! We're gonna get in trouble!"

Mark Copeland raced along the Ravenclaw common room to his friend Jack.

"Relax," Jack said. "We'll be fine. I have a plan."

The bell rang and the two finally exited the common room, barely escaping a bashing from the knocker on the door. They trudged through the castle until they reached the Transfiguration corridor. Jack walked in first and literally ran into Dumbledore.

"Would you boys care to explain why you are late?" He asked. Mark was about to answer when Jack did it for him.

"We're not late, Professor," he said in a matter-of-factly tone.

"Then why are you here fifteen minutes after the bell has rung, signifying the start of class?"

"A wizard is never late," Jack said, still with an air of confidence around him. "Nor is he ever early. He arrives precisely when he means to." With that, he darted past Dumbledore and into the classroom sitting with the fellow fifth-year Gryffindors.

Jack managed to not get a detention for being late that day.


End file.
